papa, can you hear me?

these are two of my favorite pictures of my dad, even though they were taken a long, long time before i was born. my parents like to say they have two families. they had six kids really close together, and when the youngest was thirteen, traveltwin and i came along. yea. it was quite the shock for them, having twins at 42. but by the time they got to us, they were parents extraordinaire.
some favorite memories with my dad: walking a ways into the woods from our campsite (we went camping a LOT) to find the most fitting branch, and him teaching me how to whittle away the bark and hard places to make a perfectly-fashioned walking stick out of it.
right after having my first baby. it was a really difficult, surreal experience for me. she was caught behind my pelvic bone and i pushed for over 3 hours. in the meantime the epidural hadn't worked correctly and i was in such pain and so tired, i felt like she would never come out. when she finally did, they took her right away and i couldn't see her or hold her for a few minutes. i remember feeling like all i wanted was to look at her and make sure she was alright, and i was jealous that all those other people could hold her before me. when they finally gave her to me, they let me hold her for just a few minutes and then whisked her away for a bath. they took my husband too so they could demonstrate the proper way to bathe a newborn. my mom and twin sister went with them to watch, and i thought i would be all alone. i was still in shock and the epidural had numbed my legs and feet so much that i couldn't move them. there was still no feeling in them for a couple of hours after the delivery. my dad said he would stay with me, and he rubbed my feet and put my socks back on for me. he adjusted my pillows, he told me how proud he was of me. i don't think i could've made it through those first few moments as a mother without him.

gone daddy gone

my husband is a great dad. it's very nice for me that it worked out that way. at our family reunion this past week, we had a little discussion about fathers and we all listed qualities that we thought were important in being a good dad. one of the things i listed was an attribute that mr. mama has in spades: a willingness to be silly. maybe that doesn't sound very important, but can you imagine a father who would never get down on the floor and play with his kids? never make them laugh by pulling funny faces at them or inventing silly songs with their names? never make up child-friendly versions of the board games his 4 year old wants to play but can't understand yet? i'm spoiled because i have a husband who does all this and so much more. his affection for his children is so genuine, so matter-of-fact, that i'm kind of at a loss as to what to say about it. i'm just grateful for it.

daddy and the little self-dresser, m. in her heart outfit: heart shirt, heart dress, heart leggings, and heart socks.


at the family reunion: little c had just got up from a nap, daddy was trying to copy his pointing.

dinner at eight in the suburbs

next time i'm feeling in a culinary-aspirational mood, i'm going to try out these little suckers. don't they look yummy?
found via jordan ferney's sweet blog. she tried them and said they were yummy and quick, two things that are very important in my little family.

you will go to mykonos...

ok, that's IT. i HAVE to see fleet foxes live. they are seriously rocking my little world. their new self-titled album is amazing. it's like the beach boys mixed with something a little more bold, a little harder. i can't put my finger on it, but it really works. even pitchfork likes them, and that's saying something, my friends.
for some reason i can't get videos from youtube to work on the blog here (i'm obviously technologically challenged), but if you want to hear some of their most excellent stuff, visit their myspace page here.

everyone knows it's windy

kite flying 4, originally uploaded by jowrites365.

the only good thing about living in a place where it's almost constantly windy is that is prime for kite flying. the other night m. headed outside with mr. mama to fly her brand new mickey mouse kite. i stayed inside with the wee one until hubby ran in and told me to watch m fly it. i headed outside with the camera, and this is what i saw. meanwhile, the light was so beautiful that i think the pictures turned out great. no thanks to me as the camera was set on auto.
for more pictures of the kite flying session, click here.

side note...

i wanna be a rock star and have autumn dewilde take pictures of me...

kid music that's actually good

so i'm always posting here about music i like; why not continue the tradition? when i started expanding my musical horizons i eventually got interested in finding kids music that didn't, how can i put this nicely, suck. in my quest i discovered that there are actually a lot of good children's artists out there. including:

they might be giants. i'm sure most people with kids know that they might be giants does kids' albums. this new one with numbers has some pretty fun songs on it.

dan zanes:
so i hear that dan zanes used to rock out in a non-kiddie band, and switched genres when he had kids. parents around the country are so glad he did! some favorites of his are: malti, around the kitchen, and dance party.
for the kids is a great series of albums that has really good musicians singing covers of old songs and some originals in kid-friendly ways. this last installment, the third, might be my favorite yet: it's got over the rhine singing "the poopsmith song", and other great tunes from rogue wave, damien jurado, great lake swimmers, and hem. yum!
sometimes i like to play non-kids' music for my kids, and they love it too! we like to listen to the you've got mail soundtrack, the white stripes singing we're going to be friends, and lots of up-beat stuff from vampire weekend, squeeze, weezer, and r.e.m. (like "shiny happy people") m.'s current favorite: "new shoes" by paolo nutini.

a time for haircuts

IMG_2532, originally uploaded by jowrites365.

it seems that pretty much every little girl i've seen in our neighborhood has long hair. many of them have moms who take the time to fix their hair in pretty braids, piggy tails, curls, and lots of other creative fabulous up-dos. we usually let millie run around with her hair not fixed. this is for a few reasons. 1) when it comes to her hair, i'm kinda lazy. 2) she HATES to have her hair combed. i mean HATES it. this goes beyond the normal ouchies that most little girls give out when having their hair combed, this is like full-on crying and wincing EVERY TIME i go to comb her hair. 3) unlike most little girly-girls (and m. is VERY girly,) m. doesn't usually want to have her hair up.
so this weekend we came to a decision: it wouldn't be so bad if we cut her hair quite short. even though all her friends have long hair. even though it seems to be quite unpopular for little girls her age. and let me tell you, we are SO HAPPY with this haircut! she can comb it out herself, it looks cute without doing anything to it, and it really suits her cute heart-shaped face. and it's going to be a great 'do for the summer ! hooray for short hair!

my selfish little "i want i want i want" wish list

so i know it's selfish, but there are a few things that have been on my big purchase, wish-i-had-'em-list for a long time now (we're talking years in some cases). here's a look into my wanting:
a new bike with a retro vibe. my current bike could probably be considered retro since i got it for christmas when i was about 11. but there's something kind of wonky about one of the wheels, and let's face it, it just doesn't ride like it used to. plus, i'd love to take my kids on bike rides on something that looked like this.
a nikon d40. this one, i know, is a major not-necessity, and so expensive, but oh, how i want one! they take such beautiful pictures, and really, when you consider what i'm taking pictures of most of the time (my kiddies) then it's impossible to have too nice of a camera, right? i mean, right??
a piano. about this, i am not going to be picky. any old piano will do, as long as the keys are all there and it stays in tune relatively well. let me just say that i took piano lessons for years, maybe 8 years, of my adolescent life (and organ lessons for a summer.) without a piano to look at and pound on and practice "clair de lune" on, i must say, there's a bit of a hole in my heart.
aaahhh. a sewing machine. sometimes i wonder how much of this desire is based in fantasy and how much in reality. i do know how to sew, and i have all these fantasies of creating beautiful sundresses for m. out of awesome vintage fabrics. but in all truth, i wonder how much i'd really use it...i want to say "ALL THE TIME!" but this is one of those, wouldn't know until you try kind of things, i'm thinkin'.

what my life looks like these days...

the never ending supply of dishes in the sink, the kids smiling, little c.'s and my foot while we were snuggling together on the couch...

give a listen to...

Beirut 34.jpg, originally uploaded by kirstiecat.

beirut.
they're a great, odd-sounding, different kind of band. perfect for when you feel weird and don't know why (a mood i've been in quite frequently lately.)

the good ol' days

the good ol' days, originally uploaded by jowrites365.

this is a pic of my parents (aren't they both gorgeous?) back in the day, before they were married, before they were even engaged i believe. i love old black and white photos, especially if they're of people i know.
having known them only all of my life and not all of theirs, it's difficult for me to imagine what was going through my parents' heads at this time, what they felt for each other, what was going on in their lives when someone held a camera up to them and snapped this moment in time... but i'm so very glad this moment was captured.
it makes me want to take more pictures, even of the moments that i feel aren't very noteworthy or maybe aren't even happy times... having records like this around 50+ years later is so worth it.

flickr stuff

tea pause, originally uploaded by Camilla E.

sometimes i look at the gorgeous photos on flickr and i find myself wanting to live inside these peoples' houses, the day they captured, or, let's face it, sometimes i just plain want their lives.

the following posts are just a very few of my favorite images on flickr. please enjoy.

goodbye spring

goodbye spring, originally uploaded by mav | port2port.

i love this picture.

i wish i came up with the idea for this.

untitled, originally uploaded by Bird in the Hand.

but i didn't. it's a flickr image of a drawing by lisa congdon, a very talented self-taught artist.

walking in the sky, originally uploaded by Camilla E.

some more flickr-ing

happy sunny saturday

State Fair Chair Lifts, originally uploaded by Tubes..

it's funny that i love this picture so much because i'm actually scared to death of those chair rides, or sky rides, or whatever they're called. but it's just such a pretty image, no?

mother's day cunundrum

i know today isn't mother's day yet, but i've been waxing thoughtful on subjects involving motherhood lately. one time i was rocking my toddler in the late hours of the night after he had woken up, and i was resting my cheek on his fuzzy little head, and i was thinking how i would just keep holding tight to him as long as he would let me. there's always a little cracking in my heart when he pulls away.

also my oldest, who is learning so much so quickly that it sometimes astounds me. whenever she guesses how to spell something, or knows what sound a letter makes, or wants to hug me an extra time, i'm just so grateful that i get to be her mom.

maybe you've sensed a big "BUT" coming, and there is one, although not in the way it might seem. what i'm trying to say is that this "but" doesn't cancel out AT ALL what i said before. i still love my kids, i'm still filled with awe by them, and i'm still grateful that i get to be their mom.

BUT sometimes i think about my other dreams, no matter how far-fetched they are: going back to school to get a masters' or phd, starting to run again, taking a photography class and being a really good photographer, teaching yoga (which is the most far-fetched of all right now, considering the shape i'm in)...really the list goes on and on. it involves traveling, dancing, drawing, and all kinds of other time-consuming and leaving-the-house measures.
i don't really have or make time for any of these dreams right now, and that is my own fault. sometimes it's difficult enough for me to get through the day with my kids fed, clothed, and somewhat happy.
right now as i try to grab a minute to myself to write this, c. is grabbing the keyboard and yelling at me for not letting him pound it.
how do i get back in the habit of chasing my dreams? how do i balance being a great mom and a well-rounded person who enjoys things other than children? i'm trying not to feel selfish for even asking these questions...

talk about uncensored!

so i just yesterday finished reading this book: please kill me: an uncensored oral history of punk. i bought it because, hey, i'm into the ramones, the clash, y'know, it's pretty good stuff.
i had no idea what i was in for. i mean, we all know that punk was NOT a pretty scene. i just had no idea how un-pretty it was! before reading, i thought, "i'm sure most of them used drugs, went a little crazy at times..." uh...yea. talk about crazy. iggy pop rolling around in broken glass on stage, drug overdoses were just common place, let's not even talk about the sex stuff. at first i thought, ok, i'm going to stop reading this book. and then i thought, this is an interesting quandry. i mean, this book leads to a lot of questions, like: how much were these people influenced by drugs? and, in order to be extremely creative, we're talking bringing on a new movement here, is it essential to be a little crazy, or at least a different kind of personality from the rest of the world?
i read the whole book, and i'll be the first one to say, if you are at ALL offended by the f-word, descriptions of taking drugs, etc., this is probably not the book for you. but i kind of looked through it as a study. and as far as all of the extreme lifestyle descriptions, if anything, they made me more determined than ever that those kinds of things are destructive and not for me. but it does make me wonder, why are so many creative people drawn to it? do you think they were self-destructive from the beginning or just adventurous souls? any thoughts?

listening to...

i know it's been pretty much forever since i posted, so i'm starting back with a boring old "what i'm listening to right now" kind of entry. here it is!

she & him is the name of talented duo m. ward and zooey deschanel. their cute olden-times sounding alt-country and pop tunes are just the right amount of melancholy and twang for me.


vampire weekend. i am ashamed to say that before their snl performance a while back i had never heard of these fine fellows. sure they're a little preppy, a little pop-ish, but i like how they blend that with really west-african pop sounds. it sounds so good together! these songs get stuck in my head and i really don't mind.


bonnie "prince" billy (aka will oldham). he was on my list to check into more closely for such a long time that i never really gave his music a good listen, until i checked out www.pandora.com to see if they could hook me up with something new and different. my nephew told me about pandora: it's a kind of internet radio that picks songs to play for you based on what bands you like and select. in the way of introducing new stuff, it was pretty decent, but very worthwhile because the one of the first tunes it played was a billy tune that i really dug. he's mellow, melodic, maybe a little sad. beautiful.